Underage drinking: Condone it or Against it?

ColoradoTeamsOverOhio3249

ColoradoTeamsOverOhio3249

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Just wondering, I’m 31 and don’t have any kids or anything. But if you did have a child in the picture, how would you address the issue of underage drinking with a teenager or kid? Would you condone them and say like “Yeah sure as long as I’m around and you’re not out doing it in public.”? Or would you prohibit the kid from drinking and say “No, children should not be drinking before they are 21, you can get arrested for that. Sorry pal.”
 
 
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The less it's about "forbidden fruit" and more about learning, the better it works. If your family has a glass of wine with dinner, a teenager should be able to have a short glass if he/she wants.
 
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We never kept alcohol in the house when our boys were underage, but we had a lot of discussions about it. I took my son out to dinner when he turned 21 just so I could buy him his first beer. He said he appreciated it, but that he'd already had a legal beer in Canada when he was 19 and went on a road trip with his 23 year-old cousin. I kinda felt cheated out of a special moment.
 
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1000% against it. Like it or not, our country has a drinking problem. It's nothing new, it's gone back several generations and although we see many lives ruined financially, physically and spiritually, it's still the "thing to do" for many growing up. I proudly say that my first beer will be my next. I've never drank and never wanted to. Wasn't in the house growing up and frankly I never had the money to throw away on it growing up. Now we never had it in our house and both my kids drink, so there's no "way to do it".

I just think kids growing up have plenty on their plate to deal with. I never had to go get my kid from a party, or ever even detected a trace on them when they came home - and believe me, when you don't drink, you sense it when it's around.

I'm a huge sports fan and it really saddens me that so many of our pro and college sports jumped in bed with the alcohol companies and it's just nearly impossible to not intermingle the two now. And we see the videos of fights in the stands where nearly 1000% of the time, alcohol is involved. And we laugh and go on with our lives. So many men have ruined their marriages and lives getting hooked on drinking.
 
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This is going to be a tough one for me as my son is 13. Alcohol has been in my life since birth (mainly miller beer products) but was never seen as a negative. I have fond memories of great story telling from my uncles on both sides of the families at gatherings while holding a can of beer. They weren’t giving us beers but they never said anything to us (cousins and siblings) if we a had a cold one whole in high school. My moms father gave me a 6 pack of High Life in 8th grade for taking the ten minutes to cut his grass. That being said if my parents could tell we’d been drinking before we got out of high school age we most certainly were grounded and they never allowed underage friends boozing at their home. Underage drinking was done in the woods or a house where the parents weren’t home.
 
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I enjoy wrestling said:
Tough one, but my answer is no.
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Is that "no" to the underage drinking in general, underage with parental guidance or to the drinking of Miller products (perfectly understandable)?

People can bring their dogs, their cats, their lizards into restaurants now but a parent can't set a glass in front of their own kid. Not sure exactly why I see those as contradictory, but I do. And as much as I was against the idea of people bring their pets into restaurants, I honestly kind of enjoy it now. Haven't had any bad experience though so there's that clouding my judgement. Same for alchohol. I don't recall anyone ever getting their kid drunk. It was to teach it as a social activity, a compliment to the meal and to take the "sneak" out of it that leads to so many problems.

I knew two instant drunks in college. They'd never had any before. Didn't know to moderate. Filled up before the alchohol affect hit and didn't know until too late, they were addictive. More unfortunately, both were belligerant drunks.
 
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eastisbest said:
Is that "no" to the underage drinking in general, underage with parental guidance or to the drinking of Miller products (perfectly understandable)?

People can bring their dogs, their cats, their lizards into restaurants now but a parent can't set a glass in front of their own kid. Not sure exactly why I see those as contradictory, but I do. And as much as I was against the idea of people bring their pets into restaurants, I honestly kind of enjoy it now. Haven't had any bad experience though so there's that clouding my judgement. Same for alchohol. I don't recall anyone ever getting their kid drunk. It was to teach it as a social activity, a compliment to the meal and to take the "sneak" out of it that leads to so many problems.

I knew two instant drunks in college. They'd never had any before. Didn't know to moderate. Filled up before the alchohol affect hit and didn't know until too late, they were addictive. More unfortunately, both were belligerant drunks.
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Let me start by saying I respect what anyone decides. Here is my story

I started sips of Gambrinus beer from my grandfather bottle. I soon learned to guzzle as big a gulp as possible. I liked the short buzz. My Grandfather, I found out later in life drank a case a day. I heard, at a young age, whiskey made him mean. I just never saw him without a beer. Flash forward to my teens. I found a way to binge drink. It seemed harmless and it was the cool thing to do. I still remember hiding Boones farm strawberry hill in the long jump pit. We were in 8th grade. 151 rum became the in thing in high school.

After I graduated I used alcohol as an stress reliever. I got up to 16 to 18 beers a day. Weekends consistently were about a 5th of Gin or Jack. I really didn't understand how to live without alcohol. My mental health and wife brought me to an understanding.
The wife was simple. I came home from a night of drinking and she met me at the door. She said I need to talk. I said ok. She said I'm pregnant. Wow, I said that's great. She then said if you don’t stop drinking I'm leaving you. I smiled and tried the same BS tactics I used before. She didn't flinch and I knew I had a choice to make.

Mental health aspect was by accident. I told my wife one day I felt weird and was going down to fire station to get blood pressure checked. I never returned and was taken to hospital. They were afraid I was going to have a stroke. Thus, my journey into mental health began.

I have 2 brothers that struggle with alcohol. 2 sister that are productive in life, but alcohol is the center of any event. One brother won't be with us much longer. I wish so badly we hadn't been raised with alcohol. I'm a strong believer in predisposition. That's my little 2 cents.

I believe alcohol has a place in society and everyone needs to make there own decisions. I believe my wife feels differently.
 
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This is a tough one. A 14 year old going out and getting drunk is way different than a 17 year old about to be in college getting drunk. I would say you would have to basically set a good example and not keep a ton of alcohol in the house. You want them to have a little bit of experience but not a ton because they'll encounter it eventually. You can still order your kid a drink at a restaurant in Ohio. I'd just make sure to share honest, heartfelt thoughts about what alcohol is like. Not a lecture but like you're talking to a buddy. As in not turn it into a rebellion thing. The worst drunks seem to be children of drunks or children of teetotalers.
 
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