G-Rated Dad Jokes

Yappi

Go Buckeyes
Definition of a Dad Joke:
A dad joke is a short joke, typically a pun, presented as a one-liner or a question and answer, but not a narrative. Generally inoffensive, dad jokes are stereotypically told by fathers among family, either with sincere humorous intent, or to intentionally provoke a negative reaction to its overly-simplistic humor.

So let's hear some of your favorite Dad Jokes...
 
 
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.

When does a sandwich cook?
When it's Bakin' Lettuce & Tomato
 
Each time we head to Central Ohio....

Did you know that Dublin is the fastestr growing city in the US?

It is always doublin'.
 
Me: The other day I drove by a small town named Engagement.
Son: Where is that?
Me: Halfway between Dayton and Marion.
 
Went to a corn festival the other day. As we were walking in an older dad was walking out with his white grass stained new balance shoes on (kid you not) and said it’s fun in there but it’s quite corny.
 
Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies.

:>---

EGA
 
When I was coaching 10U softball I had a stack of these handy to lighten the situation, especially when I visited the rubber when a pitcher was struggling.
 
When I was coaching 10U softball I had a stack of these handy to lighten the situation, especially when I visited the rubber when a pitcher was struggling.
That reminds me of some youtube videos that I watch every once in a while. In order not to derail this thread, I'm going to post them in the baseball forum.
 
Did you hear about the constipated accountant?
He couldn't budget

Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Becasue 7 ate 9

Why did 7 eat 9?
His mom told him to eat 3 square a day

My five-year old's go-to joke:
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it
 
I was at a funeral last weekend and I asked the deceased's widow if I could say a word. She said yes.

So, I said "Plethora".

She said, "Thanks, that means a lot."
 
Me: "Hey, who was the shortest man in the Bible?"

Son: "Zaccheus?"

Me: "No - it was Bildad the Shuhite.
 
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